Last week I dropped a bomb on this here blog. I wrote about medical issues I was currently facing, the fears I had surrounding said medical issues and the fact that I was still waiting on the results of the medical issues. Today I am at peace. Well, since last Friday I have been at peace. No longer fearing or fretting anything.
To clear the inter-web air… The lump that was removed from my abdomen last Monday is not cancer, but rather endometriosis. The results were in on Friday and the docs nurse called me. It was very exciting to hear, not cancer. There are still details about endometriosis that need explaining and I will seek answers at my Monday doctors appointment. But, today and everyday since last Friday, I have been able to breathe easy and rest… It is/was not cancer. It is endometriosis. Answers. That is a good thing, we’ve got answers. And there are no more lumps randomly floating around in my tummy. About that I am pleased as punch…
Now, what does this me to me? It means that I can breathe easy and truly focus on my health. And by focus on my health, what I mean is to ensure that I am visiting docs regularly, especially when little things present themselves, when there are random lumps that don’t belong and hurt, getting them checked out before a year and a half has passed. It means understanding all conditions I carry within me – thyroid issues and endometriosis alike. It means understanding ways to improve my health naturally; what foods should I eat to improve my health, what exercise should I do to keep me strong, what vitamins can I take to make me feel better. It also mean doing things that matter most to me.
This instance by no means was a life threatening encounter. However, this instance was the first time in my life where I felt I had a lot to lose. It was the first time that I feared the outcome. It was the first time I was scared of the results. I have so many people I love so dearly, it was the first time I was terrified of losing my life. And as a result it has allowed me to focus on what really matters. My daughter. My bonus babes. My Mr. My pups. My passions. My sanity and my happiness. Today and moving forward, I am going to live my life with intention and passion. I am going to live my life understanding that each moment is a choice and a memory. I am going to live my life filling my cup positively and focusing on healthy choices. I am going to live my life to the fullest and try to procrastinate less.
Thank you for the good juju, the support, the check-ins and the love over the past couple weeks. Thank you for allowing me to use this as my safe place, my emotional dumping ground, the place where my fears can be mentioned and I can let my heart be at peace while life figures it all out. All the wounds are healing beautifully. The pain is slowly leaving my body. The scars look pretty cool. And peace of mind is part of my daily routine. Thanks for the love… xo